Why Social Media Sucks and I Love Email More | Ruth Hoskins
It’s more than a hankering-for-the-90s; a time I’ve wanted less noise, more connection, more dialogue, more time away from the scroll of social media. Here’s why I love the not-so-humble email.
Photo: Kelly Back
I’m a 90s child. The Original. I danced all night at the Hacienda, raved it up to The Happy Mondays, once stabbed Posh Spice in the face by accident with a metal clothes hanger (#lifegoals), saw Liam and Noel in the pub most Friday nights, even hung out with Bez one time (he told me I had crabs. Nice). I wore cami slips over white t-shirts, Adidas Gazelles and celestial logos on hoodies. I still do.
And I sent a lot of emails back in the day. It was the main source of communication. To friends. To my parents. Sometimes the wrong emails to the wrong people (major embarrassment). Emails were my thing back then and now I realise they still are.
Nothing’s changed and yet everything’s changed. A bit like Kate Moss who aged then un-aged when she stopped drinking.
And Dave Grohl, who looks the same now as he did when I first watched him on stage in ’99, out of my face, on my friend’s shoulders.
But, yeah, email has always been a constant too. I love it as a form of communication. As someone who’s written thousands of social media posts, built strategies etc etc this sounds weird, but I can’t love social media in this way.
And I’ve tried. But 2020/21 made me really examine. I’d go on Instagram and see all those finger pointing Reels, dancing in the kitchen like nobody’s watching (except they are), and realised: it’s not my bag.
There are so many cool examples of emails out there right now.
Emails you can’t wait to read on a Sunday morning with a coffee and Radio 6 Music, highly curated and edited examples of great writing.
I’m always loving Alexandra Franzen’s emails….. Since no-one asked (stories about the place where life and food meet)….. The Round Up by Otegha Uwagba) she has a brilliant tone and voice)… Craft Talk by Jami Attenberg …so many, please drop yours in the comments.
2021 perspective
We’ve changed, haven’t we, this year?
We want less and more
Every day when I’m making a hot drink in between Zooms, I’m wondering what we want, what we crave.
I’ve spoken to friends, colleagues, ex-colleagues and, so far, I think we want “less” and “more” in equal measures:
~ Less instruction
~ Less about you, more about me, please
~ More time away from the scroll
~ More connection (deeper too)
~ More stories, experiences and anecdotes from those who make us feel something
Why email is a cool way to grow something
~ Email is permission-based.
Social media asks for likes / follows, much less of a commitment than a sign up.
~ Its not governed by algorithms.
It’s in people’s inbox; you can be sure your message will reach them and they will read it if you’re compelling enough. Less time wasted.
There are also more empirical reasons:
~ Email is a place to be more present.
There’s no doom scrolling like on social, it’s less easy to get lost down a rabbit hole if you keep your inbox down to people you really like.
A friend was telling me recently about a yoga teacher she’s signed up to via email. She said she gets as excited as when she gets an email from a friend when it pops up. That’s the goal isn’t it? We all want to be friends with people we like, on the channels we’re into.
It’s easy to skim read and go back later for a more-in depth. You know you’ve made an impact when people tell you where and when they read your email:
“Hey, I loved your view on this. I -re-read it in the bath on Sunday and got so inspired I went out and wrote to my community straight away.”
~ It encourages dialogue, something more important than ever.
We’re lost in a world of vanity. I know this isn’t just me from conversations I have with people of all ages. When you send a great email you get real replies, not ones that can be read in the public domain, not a line of ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️.
A few years ago when we were travelling around Europe I had an Instagram account for our camper van Annie . I got invited into a POD. At first I imagined a happy pod of dolphins playing in the ocean with their friends. Cute. But no. What I didn’t realise was that you were supposed to send a message via Telegram and immediately everyone in the pod would go comment. I mean. FFS! The people seemed nice enough but there was no connection based on shared interests, POV and all the other reason’s you make friends with strangers on the internet.
The outcome? I questioned my entire relationship with social media.
~ It’s slow not fast
Do you agree? We’re lost in a void of fast content, it’s a short hit. A Big Mac instead of a slow Sunday roast.
Longer-form means more insight, more real opinion, more expression of your truth whatever that is. More dialogue.
So, back to ’90s me. A girl who loved to talk. Not much has changed, but everything has.
I love to write emails to my friends, I recently read all my dad’s emails fro 1995 when I left home right up until 2004 when he died. A legacy that’s lasted. That helps me understand him, me and our dynamic seventeen years after he left the world.
Are you inspired to spend more time on email? What do you think? Please tell me what emails you love to receive below.
If you’d like to sign up to my newsletter, More Than Words, where I talk about how life feels, the ups and downs of living as a creative and quite a lot about food, too.
Originally published at https://ruthhoskins.com on February 6, 2021.
